Keith and Mike

[AssMaster]

What's up guys? I am at job 2. It might be my last weekend here. I pissed people off, and they said they were gonna go to my supervisor. I laughed at them and told them to go, what the worst he can do? Fire me? I could give a shit less. Ha ha.

[Michael Fornal]

What'd you do to piss them off? Damn potato gun getting you in trouble again?

[AssMaster]

Naw. An old man told me I need to go paint some rails, and I basically told him to go fuck himself. Good time. I miss HAC. Remeber the good times. Vidya Games. Sex in the office. Potato guns shooting 2" softy in the face? So sad that they are simply memories :(

[AssMaster]

Keith and Mike. You both suck shit. You make me so lonley and shit.

[Trent Steel]

dont get fired, for these reasons (in order)


you wont be able to post at work and I'll be bored, if you get a new job.
You have a family to support

[Keith Brown]

Fucking bastards and their damned paint and djoy.

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Trent Steel
dont get fired, for these reasons (in order)


you wont be able to post at work and I'll be bored, if you get a new job.
You have a family to support

1. This is a part time job, I am sick of working 2 jobs. Sux my sphincter.
2. I will still have on job, but even if I did not, you never heard of wellfare?

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Keith Brown
Fucking bastards and their damned paint and djoy.
Now you show up. In the middle of the fucking night. You know I am tryomg to get my motherfucking sleep on. You still make me lonley. I stand by my previous statement.

[Keith Brown]

Originally posted by AssMaster
1. This is a part time job, I am sick of working 2 jobs. Sux my sphincter.
2. I will still have on job, but even if I did not, you never heard of wellfare?


Yeah, no shit dude. I cant believe you've gone as long as you have with those hours. I dont think I could do it anymore...I did it at HAC, but that was different cause it was fun as hell. I still say 'fuck em' and their fucking painting bullshit...were you hired as a painter? No. Do you work for Dana? No. Are you there to actually 'work' and get dirty and shit? No.

Good job and djoy.

[Keith Brown]

Originally posted by AssMaster
Now you show up. In the middle of the fucking night. You know I am tryomg to get my motherfucking sleep on. You still make me lonley. I stand by my previous statement.


...loivke?

[AssMaster]

Keith. Stupid AIM will not work for me. Hm. Yeah I can have so much more of a life with only one job. I will start making my moey by hosting poker tourney's and taking 5% off the buy in for my hostisms.

[AssMaster]

Today is sucking shit too cause I got a killer fucking ear ache and shut. Fuck me sideways.

[AssMaster²]

PM me back, whore.

[AssMaster]

Ha ha, you are mean today. I guess you are talking to me cause you are ignoring mike. LOL. Sorry.

[AssMaster²]

That and the fact that all I'm doing today at work is shredding endless amounts of paper and listening to emo music.

[brandon-n]

emo

[AssMaster²]

I told you I'd be emo. I think you should just ban me and rid the board of unnecessary emo.

[AssMaster]

What the fuck is emo. It is pissing me off. Everyone always says it and I play along like I know what it means. Well guess what everyone "I do not know what 'emo' means."

Go ahead make fun of the dumb redneck for EastTexas for not knowing what 'emo' means . Ban me for not knowing what 'emo' means.

For the love of Christ what does 'emo' mean?

Someone.....


Anyone.....


please.....:(

[AssMaster²]

Emo ('http://"http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=emo&r=f"')

[AssMaster]

Yeah that word is not near is funny as everyone makes it out to be. I demand that everyone quit using it at once!!!!!!!

[AssMaster²]

I'm not using it to be funny. I'm using it because that's what I really am right now. :P

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by smellyshelly
I'm not using it to be funny. I'm using it because that's what I really am right now. :P
Just use I am sad. Or I am lame. Just do not use emo. Cause well emo is sorta emo.

[AssMaster²]

Well, I'm so uber fantastically sad that sad isn't a good enough word to show how I'm feeling. Emo would be a better word for it.

[AssMaster]

Try using superfucingdown (http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=supafucingdown&r=f)

[Michael Fornal]

http://www.keithandmike.com/forums/images/smiles/thumbsdown.gif!

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Michael Fornal
http://www.keithandmike.com/forums/images/smiles/thumbsdown.gif!
Dude, fuck you. That was supafucing great. You suck. I will cut you in the we we.

[AssMaster²]

I'm too supafucingmad to be supafucingdown, now.

[AssMaster²]

I'm black, but sadly, I lack soul.

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by smellyshelly
I'm black, but sadly, I lack soul.
You need to try to be Superfucingblack and shit.

[AssMaster²]

I've been trying for 20 years and it hasn't worked so far. :(

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by smellyshelly
I've been trying for 20 years and it hasn't worked so far. :(

Hmm. All you have to do is watch some Malcom X and listen to some 2 pac. I could be more black than you. Word.

[AssMaster²]

Well, apparantly, I'm COMPELTELY insane so maybe that helps the blackness some.

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by smellyshelly
Well, apparantly, I'm COMPELTELY insane so maybe that helps the blackness some.
Yeah, cause most blacks are insane.

[Keith Brown]

Originally posted by AssMaster
Yeah, cause most blacks are insane.

True story.

[AssMaster²]

Woohoo! I guess I'm black now.

*sings the Insane in the Membrane song*

[flychick]

Wow. I just read this page before the first page and I was wondering how I got so lost. Ok, today I learned what emo means and superfucingdown mean. Ok, now I understand.

[AssMaster]

See we can talk here. Hopefully the bitches will stay out of this thread and we can keep it pure and shit.

[Keith Brown]

Sweet ass...thats good as shit dude.

2 cigs a day? Awesome.

Good job on gettin' rid of that pack, what the fuck was she thinking?!?!

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Keith Brown
Sweet ass...thats good as shit dude.

2 cigs a day? Awesome.

Good job on gettin' rid of that pack, what the fuck was she thinking?!?!
Dude you know it and I know it, women can be sunch dumb cunts sometimes. I am making myself quit, just so she has no excuses. Now if she won't I will force her. I can be very persuasive.

[Keith Brown]

I thought she was quitting...did she decide to just give up and keep smoking or some shit? wtf?

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Keith Brown
I thought she was quitting...did she decide to just give up and keep smoking or some shit? wtf?
She is, and she is doing good. Just not as good as I would like. I will force her. I will not let this hurt my baby...It is hard for her. She has been smoking since she was 14.

[Keith Brown]

Cool...soon both of you guys will be smoke free and that will kick ass...just imagine the skrilla you'll be saving. Awesome.


You're actually kicking some ass with your quitting and shit....like, what, 30 a day to 2 a day is good dude.

[AssMaster]

It has been hard, but I finally just got my mind right. I can not beleive that I ever started. Such a bad worthless habit. It is sure going to suck when I play poker now. I loved to smoke and play poker...I might start doing cigars. Just for the effect. When I play poker

[Keith Brown]

hahaha!! As long as you dont get addicted to the smoke and then eventually ween back into cigarettes again.

[AssMaster]

Nah, I can handle cigars. I do not like them that much. What are you doing for Turkey Day?

[Keith Brown]

All of my relatives are coming over here to do Thanksgiving....good food, Manning football, family..goooood times.


You?

[AssMaster]

I think I am going to sit around and watch my sister have sex with my dog. That is what we ussually do. She sure loves dogs and shit.

[Keith Brown]

haha...with Penis?

[AssMaster]

No. With holly. I want to have sex with your dog. He is sexxxxxxxxxxxxy.

[Keith Brown]

Whats funny is nobody knows that you have a dog named "Penis". Haha....losers.


http://www.keithandmike.com/keith/pictures/mav/10months8.jpg

sexy....

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Keith Brown
Whats funny is nobody knows that you have a dog named "Penis". Haha....losers.


http://www.keithandmike.com/keith/pictures/mav/10months8.jpg

sexy....
That really is a pretty dog. You look like a fag. But the dog is pretty.

[Keith Brown]

I look like a hot slice of beefcake.....ass.


He is pretty as shit and the older he gets the smarter he is getting and the better trained he gets.

I loivke him so much.

[Keith Brown]

oh yeah and "I WILL DESTROY YOU FOR SLANDERING MY HOTNESS"




....and djoy.

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Keith Brown
oh yeah and "I WILL DESTROY YOU FOR SLANDERING MY HOTNESS"




....and djoy.
How is telling you, you look like a fag "slandering your hottness"? It is not queers are prettier than us right?

[Keith Brown]

hahaha, you got me there dude.


Dude...I just got done watching some movie called "Lock Up" with Stallone in it....never heard of it before, it was actually pretty good.

btw, I went to Walmart to get MGS3 and it wasnt there :(

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Keith Brown
hahaha, you got me there dude.


Dude...I just got done watching some movie called "Lock Up" with Stallone in it....never heard of it before, it was actually pretty good.

btw, I went to Walmart to get MGS3 and it wasnt there :(
Fuck shit dude. Why don't you go hit up bestbuy or some shit that will have it? You need it Keith. You need it now!!!!! Plus why ain't choo wit de ole laty twonite?

[Keith Brown]

She went to Oklahoma with her sister and her parents....then she is going to Disneyland this weekend so I wont see her until next week sometime. :(


*I'm actually about to run to Target right now and see if they have it.....if they do, I'll be playing it all night long!!

[AssMaster]

Dude, if you get it call me and tell me how bad ass it is, so I can masterbate to it tonight. Whitney sort of pisses me off.

[Keith Brown]

I got it!!!!


...why does she piss you off?

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Keith Brown
I got it!!!!


...why does she piss you off?Is it awsome? Cause she is always doing shit and shit. And you are not. Pisses me off. Katie tried to do that shit once. Said she was going to Australia with one of her friends. I told her ok, but all your shit will be out of my appartment when you get back, and I will never speak to you again. Suffice to say she did not go. She knew she had a good thing.

[Keith Brown]

Yeah, I dont like her going places without me and shit either......


I havent played it yet. I am watching a "HISTORY OF METAL GEAR" documentary on G4TV...I'm gonna put it in and play it in about 6 minutes though!

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Keith Brown
Yeah, I dont like her going places without me and shit either......


I havent played it yet. I am watching a "HISTORY OF METAL GEAR" documentary on G4TV...I'm gonna put it in and play it in about 6 minutes though!


I wish we did not have to do all this family bull shit for TG, I would so drive up their tonight and play with you all night. Maybe play the game a little too. Plus we could sleep together and shit.

[Keith Brown]

!!!


I'm all about sleeping together and shit....on my king sized bed we'd have plenty of 'spoon room'.

[AssMaster]

Seriously dude. We could sleep together in a fucking twin. With the erections that would be going on in that room, there is no way we could roll off the bed.

[Keith Brown]

Thats true....and we could always just 'lock ourselves together'

haha...good times.

[AssMaster]

Have you started playing yet? I am guessing no, cause you are still posting.

[AssMaster]

I retract my previous post. Is it awsome? Oh so awsome? Fun fun, silly willy?

[Keith Brown]

Its fun as hell...hard as shit at some points, but fun as hell


Playing it right now while I watch the foosball game on tv.

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Keith Brown
Its fun as hell...hard as shit at some points, but fun as hell


Playing it right now while I watch the foosball game on tv.
I want to get it soon. But I do not know what the big hurry is. I really do not need to spend the money on it right now. And if I got free time, I need to be doing other shit instead on playing vidya games. Plus Katie is mean and told me that I could only get that or SpiderMan 2 when it comes out. I think I am gonna go buy spiderman, and wait till I can get MGS3 on ebay for about 30 dollas. They hype on it will die down in a few months. Then I will have time to play it too.

[Keith Brown]

Yeah, let the hype die down and it'll be cheaper...thats the best idea.

Hell, you should let the hype die down on Spiderman 2 as well....wait two weeks from the release date and then go to Blockbuster and buy it used 2 for $20.00 Thats what I do.

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Keith Brown
Yeah, let the hype die down and it'll be cheaper...thats the best idea.

Hell, you should let the hype die down on Spiderman 2 as well....wait two weeks from the release date and then go to Blockbuster and buy it used 2 for $20.00 Thats what I do.
Fuck that I am buying that shit as soon as possible....then I am gonna watch it like 4 times in a row.

[Keith Brown]

Hahah. Touche, my friend...touche.


I prolly wont buy it. I'll wait till the third one comes out on DVD, then buy the Special Edition Trilogy Collection package.

[AssMaster]

Do you not even own the first one yet? For shame Keith. For shame. I have watched the first one numerous times too. I love spidey. The second one is so much better than the 1st too.

[Keith Brown]

I bought the first one.

Then two months later they came out with a Special Edition....I almost bought that, but refrained.

Then the second movie came out at the theatres and their was yet another Special, Special Edition different from the first two releases...I wanted that one but didnt want to dish out 25 bucks for it.

So basically they tried to get 20 out of the first DVD, then another 22 out of the second DVD, and another 25 out of the third one. Fuck that, I'm not paying 70 bucks per movie.

I'll wait and buy all of the Super Ultra Special Special Editions in a Trilogy pack.

...stupid 'tha man' and him trying to hold me down with movies and shit.

[AssMaster]

Fuck that, Ussually all those special editions amoun to shit. Fuck that. All I want is the movie any way. Just like LotR came out with all those supposed extra footage. But to me it did not make the movie better. I just bought MGS3 on Ebay. I was trying to get a good deal. Then I just bidded my ass off. Cause some one outbid me in the last fucking minute. So I bid again just to show him who was boss. Now I feel stupid.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewI...me=STRK:MEWN:IT ('http://"http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&rd=1&item=8148634072&ssPageName=STRK:MEWN:IT"')

[Keith Brown]

hahaha!

$37.00 aint bad though..I paid about $54.00 for it (after taxes and shit) so you saved about $18.00.

Good job man.

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Keith Brown
hahaha!

$37.00 aint bad though..I paid about $54.00 for it (after taxes and shit) so you saved about $18.00.

Good job man.
I paid 7 dollars for shipping, so I saved about 10 dollars. Still not a bad deal. Gonna try to sale some shit on ebay to pay for it. I could prolly sell Def Jam for around 30, that is more than I can get for it at Game Stop, but I like that game. Hmmm. What can I sale? To bad my virginity is gone. Do you think anyone would pay for a ten minute conversation with me?

[Keith Brown]

hahah, dude....give it a shot and see if you can get something out of it


I honestly bet you could get like $2.37 out of it...somebody wanting to be funny or some perv dude who thinks it'll be worth it.

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Keith Brown
hahah, dude....give it a shot and see if you can get something out of it


I honestly bet you could get like $2.37 out of it...somebody wanting to be funny or some perv dude who thinks it'll be worth it.
LOL. I will start the bidding at 50 cents. Somebody has got to buy that.

[Keith Brown]

Dude..that would be awesome!

[AssMaster]

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewI...me=STRK:MESE:IT ('http://"http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&rd=1&item=5539437902&ssPageName=STRK:MESE:IT"')


Ha ha. Would that be funny if I could seriously make a dollar off of this?

[Keith Brown]

Hhahaha, you are under "Weirdstuff/slightly unusual"

Thats so cool. I hope you get offers, that would rule.

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Keith Brown
Hhahaha, you are under "Weirdstuff/slightly unusual"

Thats so cool. I hope you get offers, that would rule.
Me too. How do you have negative points?

[Keith Brown]

Fuck if I konw...people probably trying to steal them from me or some shit

I could honestly care less....the points are gay as shit, you should have been here back in the day when Jared and everybody else were making a HUGE ordeal about points, as if they were actually worth money or something. It was ridiculous.

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Keith Brown
Fuck if I konw...people probably trying to steal them from me or some shit

I could honestly care less....the points are gay as shit, you should have been here back in the day when Jared and everybody else were making a HUGE ordeal about points, as if they were actually worth money or something. It was ridiculous.
Dude, what do you mean they do not matter. They matter. They matter a whole lot. I mean with points you can do so much. Fuck, if anyone ever tries to steel mine, I will keel them.

[Keith Brown]

lmao!

Points have always pretty much been worthless, except for a few people who still live by them....they are ignored mostly.

[AssMaster]

I live by them. Live by them I tell you. Oh. The Queer is mad at me . :(

[Keith Brown]

Did you offer him...yah know....your 'services' as a peace offering?


I'm sure that would make him happy. I know it would make me happy.

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Keith Brown
Did you offer him...yah know....your 'services' as a peace offering?


I'm sure that would make him happy. I know it would make me happy.Fuck him. You know I do not like queers. I ain't offering him shit. But you on the other hand can just come and get it.

[AssMaster]

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewI...ssPageName=WDVW ('http://"http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=324&item=5538379322&rd=1&ssPageName=WDVW"')

Do you think I need to show a picture of my boob like her?

[nickbahh]

I don't think you have a choice, she's kicking your ass.

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by nickbah04
I don't think you have a choice, she's kicking your ass.
Yeah she is. Stupid bitch. I am surprised you did not bid Nick. :(

[nickbahh]

i spent all my money bidding on her

[AssMaster]

You fucker. I thought we had something special.

[Keith Brown]

Hahhaa.

She is about to make 13 dollars for one fucking hour of talking on MSN...thats fucking ridiculous.

People are such pathetic fucks. Dammit, that almost pisses me off that she could make 13 bucks just to talk on MSN....fucK!

[nickbahh]

I'm sorry I just saw boob and went crazy. Here's a million points lets put this behind us.

[Michael Fornal]

I could go for some real live boob right now.

[AssMaster]

Dude. If no one bids on this. Someone from her bid on it and I will not make you pay. I can use it just for the feedback.

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Keith Brown
Hahhaa.

She is about to make 13 dollars for one fucking hour of talking on MSN...thats fucking ridiculous.

People are such pathetic fucks. Dammit, that almost pisses me off that she could make 13 bucks just to talk on MSN....fucK!
No dude that is GB money. IT is more like dollars.

[Keith Brown]

Fuck myself in mine own ass...mine own ass I tell yah!!

I'm bored as fuck. ...so very, very bored.

I hate being at work and just sitting here bored as fuck. :(

[AssMaster]

I hate work whether i am busy or not.

[Michael Fornal]

Me too, Kyle. Meeee toooo.

Keith, hire me. Damnit.

[Keith Brown]

LMAO...getting there dude..honestly I am.

I've taken over the IQMS(computerisms) management almost completely, the trucking, the steel tracking, the inventory management, purchasing management(all purchases go through and are authorized by me)...its almost to the point where "I wont be able to handle it anymore" and then viola. :)

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Keith Brown
LMAO...getting there dude..honestly I am.

I've taken over the IQMS(computerisms) management almost completely, the trucking, the steel tracking, the inventory management, purchasing management(all purchases go through and are authorized by me)...its almost to the point where "I wont be able to handle it anymore" and then viola. :)
Then viola...you are fired for failing a drug test.

[Michael Fornal]

Awesome.

And whatever kyle, we only use undetectable shit. Like flinstone's vitamins and slim fast.

[Keith Brown]

Failing a drug test?

I havent passed a drug test my entire life, not until recently did I finally realize that it was because my body secretes entirely to much acidic deposits so I fail tests....damn pancreatitis.

Now I have doctor verification for when I fail drug tests....so it matters not.

[AssMaster]

I said you are fired. Fired for for methamphetimeineieseings in your blood.

[Keith Brown]

Hahaha!

Dammit all and shit.....poor guy :(


I didnt know him but from what you said about him I bet I would have called him "daddy" :(

[AssMaster]

No he was to tall. You would have hated him. He was too tall and shit.

[Michael Fornal]

What's a Nubian?

SHUT THE FUCK UP!

[AssMaster]

Originally posted by Michael Fornal
What's a Nubian?

SHUT THE FUCK UP!
A nubian is a goat or a foriegner. So you shut the fuck up!!!!!!!!!!!

[Keith Brown]

It was a line from a Kevin Smith movie.....

I'll take a goat princess though. :)

[AssMaster²]

Hey gies and shit. What it is my nigras? I miss you muchos in the genitailialiaiialiea area.

[Keith Brown]

haha..."What it is?" .....I used to love Terrance. :(

[AssMaster²]

LOL. It is a sad thing that we miss that nigra. So sad. He was funny. He also got VD a lot. Good times.

[Keith Brown]

Yeah, but he told such awesome stories.

I know that he was basically a horrible person but after hanging out with him at his house a few times and stuff I realized that he meant well and he loved his kids, gave them all that he could(aside from the money he spent on weed).

I actually respected him. He was a badass guy for those 4 years I knew him.

[AssMaster²]

Yeah, but he was gross too.

[Keith Brown]

Yeah he was....he was so fucking cool looking, he could have gotten normal women. Stupid him having such a low self esteem and only going after fatties.

Did you ever see his wife? She was HUGE. Once I was at his house and his wife was all pissed cause she wanted more money for some more weed and he wouldnt give it to her...she looked like the blob person from Blade 1. It actually took two chairs for her to sit comfortably, it was disgusting. She had one buttcheek on each chair and was still hanging off the sides. Nasty.

[AssMaster²]

I heard she could suck a mean dick. Emm.....fatties sucking dick. Hot. So hot. I am so sick of being ungodly busy everydays. Seriously. Fuck shit cunt and twat.

[Keith Brown]

When is it gonna stop....after the Holidays!?!

[AssMaster²]

No. Never. It is just the nature of the job. It will prolly be more busy after all the holidays. Considering a bunch of Mechanics will have put stuff off after the holidays.

[Keith Brown]

Fucking shit.

That sucks ass dude.


I liked it better when you were doing the other job...I liked it alot better, :(.

[AssMaster²]

LOL. Is my little bitch lonley? Is he? Well is he?


Suck me in the butt.

[Keith Brown]

No. Not really lonely. Not at all actually.

Just liked your other job better.



I still hate you regardless.

[AssMaster²]

Dude? You hate me? What the fuck? That is not a cool thing to say. Do not even joke like that. Not funny. I am being all nice to you and telling you to suck my butt, and you come back with "I hate you regardless" statement. Dude, that is beyond not cool. I mean beyond and shit. As a matter of fact that is super uncool. That is worse than raping you G-ma. It is almost as bad as raping your G-ma's G-ma, and that is pretty bad and shit. Man, what happened to you Keith. The Keith I knew a few days ago would never say anything like that. Never ever. What has happened to you? What? Have I wronged you in some previous life? Did I do something so unjust, that you can not find it your heart to fogive me? Did I cause an emotional scar to deep to heel? Cause you did, you did my friend. Hate is a strong word. Hate can not be taken back. Hate is forever. I am so dissapointed in you. You have done me wrong. So wrong. Super wrong in fact. Super Duper wrong as a matter of fact :(

[Keith Brown]

:(

Its all that old guys fault for getting fired and that whore lady making you work and you getting moved into the office so you dont have much free time anymore.

....its all so........wrong.


I may have to cut her when I come down there so she'll stop fucking with you and then you can relax and enjoy more free time.

[AssMaster²]

I still see no reason for you hating me. Still not cool.



Dude? You hate me? What the fuck? That is not a cool thing to say. Do not even joke like that. Not funny. I am being all nice to you and telling you to suck my butt, and you come back with "I hate you regardless" statement. Dude, that is beyond not cool. I mean beyond and shit. As a matter of fact that is super uncool. That is worse than raping you G-ma. It is almost as bad as raping your G-ma's G-ma, and that is pretty bad and shit. Man, what happened to you Keith. The Keith I knew a few days ago would never say anything like that. Never ever. What has happened to you? What? Have I wronged you in some previous life? Did I do something so unjust, that you can not find it your heart to fogive me? Did I cause an emotional scar to deep to heel? Cause you did, you did my friend. Hate is a strong word. Hate can not be taken back. Hate is forever. I am so dissapointed in you. You have done me wrong. So wrong. Super wrong in fact. Super Duper wrong as a matter of fact :(

[Keith Brown]

Dont' call your Daddy a 'little bitch' then.


Then you would realize.




PS: I will cut her for you if you want though. ..seriously.

[AssMaster²]

My Daddy, would nevar say he hates me. You are no father of mine. So bite me. Cunt face. I will ruin you life if you fuck with. So don't start this "I am your Daddy" BS. I own you. You are mine. You know it, I know it, MMC knows it. You are owned. I have you tagged as my bitch. So represent and quit your petty squabling.

[Keith Brown]

heh....okay Kyle.

I'm not going to dominate you on here....it'll just piss you off and shit.


So you can win dude.



Now, changing the subject to something more important....have you had a chance to play MGS3 anymore? I got to a certain point(dont want to say until you have gotten to it)and its kicking my ass so I've stopped.

[AssMaster²]

Ha ha..owned.


I own you. Ha ha, you submitted. I am your master. You admitted. Owned bitch. Call me Daddy, call me Daddy mother fucker. I am your master. You are "Ass", and I am AssMaster.


Know that I own you.




I have not played anymore.

[AssMaster²]

I am going to cut your eyes out and skull fuck you empty eye sockets. Then I am going to have a DR. Pepper. Then I am gonna lick you toes. And you are gonna be like "What's licking my toes?" Cause you will not be able to see. And shit.

[Keith Brown]

heh...okay kyle.

Regardless of this juvenile argument that you have come up with, I am always going to be your Daddy. That will never change. All people go through denial and through 'rough' stages in life where they revolt against their Daddy...this, Kyle, is your time. That is okay. I can handle this stage in your development, I'll sit back and allow you to grow up at your own pace. I understand what you are going through, for once I revolted against my own Father, now I am older and wiser. Much wiser.

I will wait for your wisdom to grow and flourish. I understand.

Let your anger out, just let it out. Once its all out in the open, you will be able to look back and learn from your many mistakes.


...and then Daddy will accept you again. Yes, I will. I will once again cum in your asshole and you will enjoy it.



I havent either....I think I might not go back and play it ever again....I kinda got bored of it after a while.

[Keith Brown]

Dude...I love when you lick my toes. mmmmmh...so hot.

[AssMaster²]

Hey Mike, what you doing. Thinking about getting another card game together some time in the next month or so. Wanna come?

[Michael Fornal]

Yes sir.. yes I do. Sounds like much fun!

[AssMaster²]

Think we can get any other these fist fuckers will want to come? I want to get in a good one before the old lady drops the package. Cause I bet when she does, she will be all wierd about a bunch of faggots we do not know coming to the house.

[Michael Fornal]

hahaha.. indeed.

Brandon should go - want me to bug him aboot it?
Other than that... people are flakey meanie heads for the most part. :)

[AssMaster²]

Originally posted by Michael Fornal
hahaha.. indeed.

Brandon should go - want me to bug him aboot it?
Other than that... people are flakey meanie heads for the most part. :)
Yeah and that fuck face Kenny.

[Michael Fornal]

Pick a specific weekend, yo.

[AssMaster²]

Will do, I need to talk to Katie and get permission. Keith, will you come? To the poker game, not on my face.

[AssMaster²]

Hey Keith you fist fucker. I just realized you never responded to this, prepare to be punished.

[Keith Brown]

Dude, you know I'm all about visiting my loivke and loivke-ette.

Questioning me about this is worthless. The answer is always 'yes', silly.


Anyways.....I am a man now Kyle.

I own a gun.
I own a truck.
I took life....went Quill hunting and killed some beetches. You would be proud of me.

[AssMaster²]

Dude, my cell phone is jacked. How many did you kill? Plus, it is Quail, not Quill.

[Keith Brown]

I only killed one.

We were out there for like fucking 5 hours but we couldnt find any cubby's. We ran up on two cubby's right off the bat but the dogs were so excited they ran them off about two miles! The dogs are still puppies so they arent trained as well as they would like, I would guess...but after they stretched their legs out a little bit they were doing great.

I couldnt carry my gun cause when we went to go get my 5 day license they wanted a hunters safety course number and I didnt have one, so we went out there with just two guns(Daryl and his Dad held theirs until we were deep into the land and we had cover). I think we spent about two hours before we came upon another cubby and then we were so surprised by it cause only one of the dogs was pointing, the other was about 200 yards away still searching and we were watching the wrong dog and walked right up on the birds and they took off. By the time we pulled up to shoot they were too far away.

I only shot 4 times, folded up one bird. We saw a total of 5 cubby's and about a total of 15-18 birds. We got 7 of them, but alot of the time we were so close to the road that I didnt get to shoot.

It was amazing watchign the dogs work and watching one dog point and the other dog honor her point. It was good times.

[AssMaster²]

I forgot abot hunters education. You need to do that, and Katie can go with you. She needs it to, so we can kill animals and shit.

[Keith Brown]

Yeah, pissed me off. I wanted to kill something with MY gun, not his automatic 12 gauge.

[AssMaster²]

Dude, I have lost like 5 pounds since I have started coon hunting so much. We walk like a mother fucker. If I keep going everyweekend, I bet I can get back to my sexy slim self.

[Keith Brown]

Awesome.

We walked about 5 miles at least on Saturday.....I got to break in Daryl's new shoes...heh. Needless to say my feet are still a little sore today.

[AssMaster²]

I do not feel good, I think this baby is fissin to go home and curl up with a good book.

[Keith Brown]

lucky.


I would like to go home and sleep....I miss sleeping....I love to sleep.

[AssMaster²]

I really feel like hammered dog shit. And I do not feel good either, plus I feel real bad.

[Keith Brown]

Whats wrong? Sickness or just sleepy and tired?

[AssMaster²]

I think I have anal aids, but I am not sure.

[AssMaster²]

Dude, I did my taxes last night. All I am getting back is fucking 500 dollars. I am so fucking pissed right now I could explode.

[Keith Brown]

I am supposed to get back around 850ish.

Thats okay with me I guess...I would have really liked to get back 1k though.


PS: How is your anal aids doing?

[AssMaster²]

The Aids is going great, I guess. Dude, I would be happy with 850 too, but this 500 dollars is pissing me off, I thought I would get back at least 1300.

[Keith Brown]

That would piss me off too. Are you claiming everything correctly?

How much do you normally, in the past, get bacK?

[AssMaster²]

Since I started working at HAC, I have never got less than 1500 back. Makes me super sad. I am gonna look into it more, but I think this is all I am gonna get back

[Keith Brown]

Shitcockass.

Since I have started working (HAC for 6 years, TAC for 2 years, and BTM for 1 year) I have never, EVER gotten back more than 950. Fucking shit, that makes no sense that I was getting back so fucking little bit and shit.

[AssMaster²]

Every other year I got credits because of college, last year I got so much back cause of my house and milage that I used my truck for. Next year I should do good cause I got a kiddo.

[Keith Brown]

Mileage you used your truck for?

Is this something that I could perhaps take advantage of?


...I might have to marry Whitney and get her babymaker goin' just so I can get some more money back at the end of the year and shit! ;)

[AssMaster²]

Remember when I worked for TRA? I got to count all my milage cause I used my personal truck for work. Not just Transport to and from a place employment to home. I used that mother fucker all over the metroplex.

[Keith Brown]

Oh yeah, thats awesome.

I wish I could get back move on my taxes, but I guess I'll be happy with always getting back 800-950.

[AssMaster²]

I been trying to do my taxes at work. It is showing that I fucking owe now. This is such bull shit.

[Keith Brown]

I doubt you owe. You are probablly just doing something wrong on the tax returnisms or something.

No way that you would have to owe when nothing has really changed between this year and last.

[AssMaster²]

No, Dude, I am pretty sure I fucking owe, the only way I am gonna be able to get money back it to cheat. LOL.

[Keith Brown]

How the shit can you owe? What changed?

...that makes no sense whatsoever?

[AssMaster²]

Shit man I do not know, But I am so god damn mad. I guarantee that it is Katie fault. As soon as she give birth, I am gonna hit her.

[Keith Brown]

haha!

Thats good shit.

Stupid taxes, it makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.



oh and if you dont get a new phone soon, I'm going to be sad :(

[AssMaster²]

Yeah, my phone is pissing me off so fucking bad, I was gonna buy a new one, but with owing the IRS so much, I might just kill myself instead.

[Keith Brown]

Does Katie's work still?

If so, I'll call her phone to talk to you if I need to get ahold of you and your phone doesnt work. I have it saved on my phone.

[AssMaster²]

Yeah, for now if you need me just call Katie phone at night and I will talk to you, I am gonna get a new phone soon though. I hope anyway.

[Keith Brown]

Okay, awesome. I'll do that.

Speaking of Mommy.....how is she doing?


Any news with the baby?

[AssMaster²]

Dude she is getting big, I hope she does not have horrendous stretch marks. That will piss me off and I will have to send her in and get her fixed and shit.

[Keith Brown]

Rub that shit on her so that she wont get them...talk to her about it so she doesnt get mad at you for wanting to lessen the stretch marks after she has the baby. I'm sure she'd understand if you brought it up to her in a gentle way.

[AssMaster²]

She has been using that shit, I am just not sure how well it works.

[Keith Brown]

I'm sure it will work well enough.

If not then you can always have them do that laser therapy shit that is supposed to lessen the showings of scars and/or stretch marks.

I dont know how much that costs or how exactly it works, but I remember them talking about it on the mid-day show on 105.3 last year.

[AssMaster²]

Dude, do you ever feel like life is just one constant uphill fucking struggle? I mean shit. It is bad enough that I took a 10000 dollar paycut from last year, now the IRS is fucking me in the Asshole like a fucking donkey. My boss just called me in the office and asked me if my DL was current. I told him no, he said I need to get it current or be with out a job. I can not fucking see, so I will probably have to get glasses before I can get one. And I think I have a warrant in Fort Worth, so there is a chance they will take me to jail. Shit fuck it has been a horrible week, I am almost ready to give and say fuck it. Take me to jail, fire my fucking ass, and take everything I own and kiss my fucking ass.

[Keith Brown]

Dude, I totally agree with you.

Life is hard as shit for me lately too. I cant seem to get ahead, no matter how much I can manage to make. My job is hard as shit and dealing with the people that I have to deal with day in and day out gets tiring....the President of the company hates me and ridicules me for being so young, I never spend time with Whitney cause she is always babysitting or doing homework for school cause her nursing classes are so damned hard.

Life is hard. They tell you that they are getting you ready for 'real life' in high school, thats a bunch of bullshit. Nothing can get you prepared for real life, life is fucking hard as shit and the problems dont ever do anything but stack up and get worse as you grow older.

ah well....I'm going to be an Uncle soon and you a Daddy....that will make me happy and I will rejoice in joyous laughter.

[AssMaster²]

Dude, will you visit me in prison. You know what they do to pretty boys like me in prison. I know I am gonna be somebody's bitch, and as nice as that sounds, I do not want to go to jail.

[Keith Brown]

Why do you have to go to Fort Worth to get your Drivers License renewed...cant you just mail it in and do that? Or are you saying that if you go up to the DMV and/or mail anything in then they will find out that you have a warrant in Ft. Worth and then arrest you?

Also, why in the hell do you have to have a current DL for your job, you arent doing any driving are you?


Also, if you actually do end up getting into trouble and going to jail....call me and I'll find a way to get you out, be it bail or breaking your out....I'll get you out before you get violated in there.

[AssMaster²]

Dude, I am gonna go down here to try to get my license. If you do have to bail me, will you try to let me get violated first? I bows-well get something out of the deal.

[Keith Brown]

ha ha. Okay, just dont call me until you've 'had your fill' in jail, then I'll bail or break you out.

[AssMaster²]

Fuck shit man, I called the DMV and they said my license is flagged and I can not get my shit renewed untill I get this taked care of. I called the number they gave me and it gives me a busy signal. My boss told me that I had a week to get it taken care of or I would get fired.

Dude, this is pissing me off and making me sad, I have a feeling that Baby Jesus is crying right now.

[Keith Brown]

I must be missing something....why would your drivers license be so important to them? Why the fuck does it matter if your drivers license is current or not to your job?!?

[AssMaster²]

Some shit about insurability or some shit. It is so fucked up. I finally got ahold of someone and they told me to call that fucking 1800 # again and that mother fucker does not work.

Fuck shit my life is sucking right now.

[Keith Brown]

Try to look it up on the internet using the yellow pages or something...if anything call back and ask the people where the office of the 1800 number is located, then you will be able to find it on the internet yellow pages and get a number for them.

Thats ridiculously fucking gay dude.....that sounds like a faggot, bullshit excuse to me....insurability......yeah right, whatever...fuck

[AssMaster²]

I am going to Fort Worth tommorow to pay the ticket. Good times. Hope it clears off fast so that I can get my DL.

[Keith Brown]

Originally posted by AssMaster²@Feb 2 2005, 12:18 PM
I am going to Fort Worth tommorow to pay the ticket. Good times. Hope it clears off fast so that I can get my DL.

263282


Dude...that sucks balls man. Thats a far as fucking drive just to pay a friggin ticket!

You shouldnt drive home that late at night..you can come sleep with me. :)

[AssMaster²]

Yeah, like we would get any sleeping done.

[Keith Brown]

Originally posted by AssMaster²@Feb 2 2005, 01:15 PM
Yeah, like we would get any sleeping done.

263302


oh we'll get plenty of sleep alright........we'll both be WORN OUT after what I have planned for you.

[AssMaster²]

Dude, you have no idea what kind of punishment I am capable of taking. I am like the battery bunny, I just keep cuming, I mean going...or..shit cock....ok..whatever.

[Keith Brown]

I just touched myself.....and now I feel naughty.

[AssMaster²]

I feel better, I just talked to the head guy and he said he would not fire me if it took me a little longer to get my license taken care of. He is a fucking winner.

[Keith Brown]

For real...that would be gay to fire a good worker over something like that when they are actively trying to fix it.

[AssMaster²]

Dude, I paid my ticket in Fort Worth, I got home and called that 1-800-# they gave me. It turns out the ticket that is holding me up is in Big Sandy, the one I got about 4 yrs ago.

Man this sux my ass off.

[Keith Brown]

oh fuckshit......now you have to go pay that one too?

How much did you have to pay in Ft. Worth?

[AssMaster²]

261 FUCKING dollars. I do not know what the one in Big Sandy is gonna be. I got it back when we both worked at the original HAC. Back when I had the dodge. Dude, that has to be almost 4 years ago.

[Keith Brown]

Fuck yeah I remember that.....dammit dude. That sucks so much ass.

You gonna get that one taken care of soon?



...on a side note, only 100 days till Aspen gets to see her Mommy and Daddy.

[AssMaster²]

Yeah I can not wait till that little money sucker to come along. I guess I need to go add her to my bill section. LOL. Dude, my bro-in-law asked me if I wanted a new job. Said it paid 18 dollars and hour. He might be full of shit, but I am gonna send them my resume anyway.

[Keith Brown]

Originally posted by AssMaster²@Feb 4 2005, 09:24 AM
Yeah I can not wait till that little money sucker to come along. I guess I need to go add her to my bill section. LOL. Dude, my bro-in-law asked me if I wanted a new job. Said it paid 18 dollars and hour. He might be full of shit, but I am gonna send them my resume anyway.

263551


Dude...that would be so badass! Did he tell you what kind of job it was, what the job details entailed?

[AssMaster²]

It would be back in the inspection business. I hated being an inspector, but the money is good. I got a family to think about and if it was even close to 18 dollars an hour I would be crazy not to at least look into it.

[Keith Brown]

Originally posted by AssMaster²@Feb 4 2005, 09:51 AM
It would be back in the inspection business. I hated being an inspector, but the money is good. I got a family to think about and if it was even close to 18 dollars an hour I would be crazy not to at least look into it.

263553


Fuck that dude....inspection cant be that bad, especially for that much of a raise that you would be getting.

You'd be completely crazy not to do everything in your power to attain that job. That would help you out so much dude.

[AssMaster²]

I done told him that I would suck a dick long time for this job. Even if they only paid me 16 dollars a hour and would give me about 10hr OT a week that would 45 grand a year. That would be about 5 grand more than I am bringing home now.

[Keith Brown]

For real dude, that would be awesome for you.

If Katie goes back to work after the baby then you guys could easily be making about 60-70k/year....thats a whole lotta money out there man, that would rule.

[AssMaster²]

Originally posted by Keith Brown@Feb 4 2005, 04:36 PM
For real dude, that would be awesome for you.

If Katie goes back to work after the baby then you guys could easily be making about 60-70k/year....thats a whole lotta money out there man, that would rule.

263566




Yeah that would hella skrilla. Plus if I could get more than 16, that would be awsome too.

[AssMaster²]

It was your turn to talk you bitch fuck. Face hit you in the lower lip nigga.

[AssMaster²]

MMC is sucking it today. That is for sure.

[NOFX13]

its true how are we suppose to enjoy our day at work without MMC
????

[AssMaster²]

I am gonna quit MMC if it does not quit sucking it up so much.

[Keith Brown]

Originally posted by AssMaster²@Feb 7 2005, 11:12 AM
I am gonna quit MMC if it does not quit sucking it up so much.

263907


Hi Kyle.


.....its cause all the chiltrins are in elementary and high school right now...they cannot type during class.

[AssMaster²]

We need to start a grown up forum for grown ups. Like 18 and up and shit.

[Keith Brown]

Originally posted by AssMaster²@Feb 7 2005, 11:16 AM
We need to start a grown up forum for grown ups. Like 18 and up and shit.

263910


Then there would only be about 6 people that could post in it :(

[AssMaster²]

Originally posted by Keith Brown@Feb 7 2005, 05:19 PM
Then there would only be about 6 people that could post in it :(

263914




Thats all we would need.

[Keith Brown]

Originally posted by AssMaster²@Feb 7 2005, 11:23 AM
Thats all we would need.

263920


You're all I need, Kyle. .....you're all I need.

[AssMaster²]

You know that is right. How is work going?

[Keith Brown]

Originally posted by AssMaster²@Feb 7 2005, 11:32 AM
You know that is right. How is work going?

263927


Ridiculously busy...pissing me off with all the busyness and shit.

I dont like being this busy, its nerve wrecking and shit.

[AssMaster²]

Originally posted by Keith Brown@Feb 7 2005, 05:49 PM
Ridiculously busy...pissing me off with all the busyness and shit.

I dont like being this busy, its nerve wrecking and shit.

263934



I am so tired today for some reason, I am going home and going to bed as soon as I get home.

[Keith Brown]

Originally posted by AssMaster²@Feb 7 2005, 12:18 PM
I am so tired today for some reason, I am going home and going to bed as soon as I get home.

263955



That sucks balls. I am really tired too.

I'll probably play Halo online for a few hours before I go to sleep though. :)

[AssMaster²]

I nevar play vidya games anymore. If I am not sleeping or doing chores, I am chillaxin in front of the TV

[Trent Steel]

Originally posted by AssMaster²@Feb 7 2005, 10:25 AM
I nevar play vidya games anymore. If I am not sleeping or doing chores, I am chillaxin in front of the TV

263965



i miss having time for video games. I dont want to get the new systems that will come out next year, but i know i will be a pussy and buy one becuase they are so cool, yet i wont have the time to play.

[AssMaster²]

I need to just sale my shit and use it for bills. I do not play it anymore, it is wasted on me.

[AssMaster²]

Junebug7700 Viewing Forum: Sex & Relationships Today, 06:44 PM


Keith your woman is learning pointers, this is bad for you.

[Trent Steel]

Originally posted by AssMaster²@Feb 7 2005, 10:50 AM
Junebug7700 Viewing Forum: Sex & Relationships Today, 06:44 PM
Keith your woman is learning pointers, this is bad for you.

263988



she could be viewing the threesome thread...

[AssMaster²]

That would piss Keith off. LOL, unless she was wanting to have one with Keith and Jessica Simpson. He might not get mad about that.

[Trent Steel]

Originally posted by AssMaster²@Feb 7 2005, 11:06 AM
That would piss Keith off. LOL, unless she was wanting to have one with Keith and Jessica Simpson. He might not get mad about that.

263999



97 days to go!

[Trent Steel]

Originally posted by Trent Steel@Feb 7 2005, 11:11 AM
97 days to go!

264005



oh crap, i didn't realize i quoted your last comment and we were talking about 3 somes. I didn't mean that he is going to have a 3 some wiht your daughter. Its my fault. dont take it the wrong way.

[Keith Brown]

Originally posted by AssMaster²@Feb 7 2005, 01:06 PM
That would piss Keith off. LOL, unless she was wanting to have one with Keith and Jessica Simpson. He might not get mad about that.

263999


!!!!!!

It is quite possible...

[AssMaster²]

Originally posted by Trent Steel@Feb 7 2005, 07:11 PM
oh crap, i didn't realize i quoted your last comment and we were talking about 3 somes. I didn't mean that he is going to have a 3 some wiht your daughter. Its my fault. dont take it the wrong way.

264008



Ha Ha, that is funny. Good one. Real good one.

[Trent Steel]

yea, i just realized you have less than 100 days.

Do you get tax exemptions for being pregnant? I know you do if you have the kid, but can you claim it while it is in the womb?

[AssMaster²]

Fuck know, I wish we could, but they say it does not count if you have not gave birth and shit. It is all bull shit.

[Trent Steel]

Originally posted by AssMaster²@Feb 7 2005, 11:54 AM
Fuck know, I wish we could, but they say it does not count if you have not gave birth and shit. It is all bull shit.

264038



seriously. You still have to pay for doctors visits, time off from work, extra food she consumes, etc. etc.

[AssMaster²]

Life is not fair.

[Trent Steel]

Originally posted by AssMaster²@Feb 7 2005, 12:21 PM
Life is not fair.

264056



Does katie work at all, or is she a stay at home wife.

[AssMaster²]

Originally posted by Trent Steel@Feb 7 2005, 08:35 PM
Does katie work at all, or is she a stay at home wife.

264064



She works. She works for CitFinancial.

[Keith Brown]

Kyle...I forgot to tell you.

I drove my truck this weekend, it was awesome...all I have to do is tear the shit off of it that I dont want on it and then get two new bumpers for it and its ready to fucking drive dude!! Its awesome.

[AssMaster²]

I am happy that you are a man, but it make me sad that my boy is growing up.

[AssMaster²]

Dude, I would be so rich if I could get that job. Sorta pisses me off that my Brother-in-Law told me about it and I prolly got no chance of getting it.

[Keith Brown]

Dude, has he said anything at all about it since you sent your resume in?

[AssMaster²]

My Bro in law has not got me and email to send it to yet. He is a fucker. He said he would get it to me today.

[Keith Brown]

Awesome.

Dude, that would rule if you got that job and shit.

[AssMaster²]

Originally posted by Keith Brown@Feb 8 2005, 02:15 PM
Awesome.

Dude, that would rule if you got that job and shit.

264231


I wonder if I would have a comp to play on all the time?

[Keith Brown]

Even if you didnt, that job would be a blessing.

It would help you out massively.

[AssMaster²]

Yeah with that kind of money I will get me a PDA and surf the internet.

[Keith Brown]

Dude, for that kind of money you could buy yourself a nice truck and even have enough money to buy soap and wash it every once in a while :)

[AssMaster²]

Dude, washing trucks is overated. LOL. Dude, I found the truck I wanted on ebay.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/ws/eBayISAP...TRK%3AMEWA%3AIT (http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=4526496569&rd=1&sspagename=STRK%3AMEWA%3AIT)


It is super cool. I could so get some ass sex from a man with that truck.

[Keith Brown]

Niiiiice. Supercharged 4x4isms would rule so much ass dude.

[AssMaster²]

What sux, is that I always find the truck I want when I am not in the position to buy it. If I could just make it till next year I think I will be able to get what I want.

[Keith Brown]

yeah, keep on top of that job dude!