Another love mail

From - Txhtgrl@aol.com

Subject - Love mail

Message - Hi, my name is Aisha and I love MMC and Jackass. About my s/n (not that u care) my nickname is Abbie as a takeoff of my last name. Yeah, I know booooooooring. Anyway, I live in Garland and my Grandpa loves your site. He's the one who told me about it (seriously). Some of my relatives live in Mesquite.Finally something good out of Texas. I personally think all or u are hot, although dan has some serious eyeborw going on. Anyway, I just want to say, to hell with the naysayers, you kick so much ass!!!
Love, Aisha

Response - None

uhh

From - BAGDPYRO@aol.com

Subject - Good/Bad

Message - you guys are a trip, dont listen to all those other jealous f*ckers, yall just keep on doing what yall like to do and tell them guys to f*ck themselves, the site looks good except for a couple broken links but nobody is perfect. All i can say is for a group of highschoolers yall kick ass. now all you need is some chicks getting naked and yall will be set.

Response - thanks man, also keep in mind when you sent this email we were in the middle of a site remodeling, and thats more than likely why you got the broken links. but anyways, thanks and I like the hot chics dancing naked idea! any takers?

Velcro

From - "* MeGs *"

Subject - OMGawd

Message - omg...dude your website is the coolest thing since like...velcro. keeep up the excelent work.

Response - I always considered velcro pretty gay :( but thanks?

we are loved

From - "Casey ."

Subject - Hey

Message - Hey guys. I was reading the love/hate mail and it's funny to read all the ones about stupid retards who analyze websites too much. They're the ones who need to get a life. Anyways.. the videos are great. Especially the wrong order ones and Special Officer Brandon. I can't get "Purple Pants are Fun!" out of my head. I saw Brandon at the Poteet Variety Show. Order more shirts whenever you can! They kick ass. Well, yeah, just wanted to say that your
site's great.
-Casey

Response - wow. somebody likes us! <3 or at least that's what i'm taking from this email.

cool

From - "thino1942"

Subject - none

Message - If your page was a person, I would not f*&k it. Nuff said.

Sincerely,
one-cent prostitute

Response - cool.

Lame Email

From - VertManX@aol.com

Subject - Another Jackass Copier

Message - Once again, we have another jackass copier that trys to be funny but doesnt do it. Your skits suck. Not even funny. And they arent even risky! And with this skateboard jousting, huuummm..where did you get that idea from? Maybe BMX Jousting like in Jackass? well, it sucked anyways. Anyone can do the skits your doing. and the skating was terrible. You cant even f/s flip off a small ledge or k-grind! Pathetic! If you trying to be funny during that skating, wasnt funny at all. YOU GUYS SUCK!

Response - this is a lame email. so unoriginal don't you think? and i wish people like this would say who they really were.

Gay Butt Sex

From - "Sterling Hyden"

Subject - I can be a cow!!!

Message - Hey my name is Sterling, I'm 16 and I live in Irving.... I like
your website and well you want people and me and my friend Jessica
(age 15) are people! We are both in the 10th grade and we go to
the Academy of Irving ISD... but we also go to Nimitz... It's a
big mess and a long story... Well hmmm... that's all I guess...
Thanks for your time....Sterling


Response - no we will not have gay butt sex with you Sterling. and what do you mean, you can be a cow? that's weird and trippy.

You didnt attach a pic :(

From - "thino1942"

Subject - pics

Message - Your Pics from Section Who We Are:
Jason: You look like a student shaken up from a dream and asked a question about the square root of zero by a teacher.
Logan: Don't you hate it when it turns out that people are actually looking.
Daniel: Your picture is the best looking one. You must have been the jerk that took these pictures.
Graeme: Lay of the drugs. Seriously. Sure, it is fun when every girl looks like a babe, but when the drugs wear off, that pretty girl laying in your bed won't look so pretty.
Nick I: Nice hat. NOT! It does not look good on either Graeme or you.
Nick II: What a boring picture.
Brandon: Watching Batwatch weren't you? Sorry, fellow, but the goodies are just good old Mr. Silly Cone.

Response - ok, well i wish we could comment on your picture but i guess you forgot to send it on accident. Anyways, what exactly is Batwatch? Should i ask my area cable provider for information on this and other hit shows?

Everything on poop

From - "thino1942"

Subject - Mr. A. Nalsex

Message - Coming from a JHHS pupil: John Horny suxs. I admire you guys for the website even though it is totally pointless. Why make a website about THIS? There are plenty of quality crap on cable. Totally irrelevent question: Do they offer Calculus in high school? Also, who's the leader in this brigade of silliness? Or all of you a "team"? Is the information in the section about poop relevent or is it made up?

Response - Why we made it? we enjoy it. yes they have calculus in HS, yes were a team, and yes, everything you have read about poop has been medically proven true.

Our coolest Fan

From - "Marcos Castellano"

Subject - GRAEME YOUR EVEN A BIGGER FAG

Message - Dude, it just comes to show how gay some guys in Mesquite can get. Poor Graeme. Everyone thought you were cool when..............oh we forgot you never were. On 6th street pictures of the street were cool...if you can't get in any of the clubs. So hope you had fun outside. Jared please post this. You know it and I know that Graeme is a fag. Whats up the pics of the so called fine chicks? Come on man take some pics of some chicks that are older than 14. And don't lie about it. Man, I couldn't watch any of the videos either and half of the pics wouldn't let me pull them up. The girls that are on the website from MHS what are you thinking? The pictures of the people with the scissors up to their face. Let me tell you man, that must of taken some BIG OL FAT BALLS to put them up near your face like that. I would never do it. YOU REBEL YOU! Oh yeah by the way I am not on drugs or on alcohol cause I am on probation. So if you want to say something smart lets try a different approach other than "Drugs and alcohol...Obviously the situation." Graeme spell your name Graham for now on like regular people. The website is gay as hell, lets go run on our spare time or go play tag or something. Cause Jay-Rod we all know you need to get in the sun a little more and drop a few pounds. Your ankles aren't fat at all. Well Gay Graeme and Gay-Rod lets talk to your parents for some possible counseling sessions cause it obvious that the attention is lacking at the house. Have fun faggots! Oh yeah this is not David Castellano. He should have MilkMyCow.com on his car too.

Response - your cool? I wish i could be just like you. uh sike.

poop barf dirty

From - "SillyTeen"

Subject - Disgusted!!!

Message - Dear milkmycow guys, I have never seen a site that is so disguesting and vulgar. I was watching the mad humping vidoeo, and i was perticually disturbed. Do you actually think that it is funny to go around and mimic the sexual act? Our lord and savior Jesus Christ gave us the act of sex to honer him, not to go around and pretend to be aroused by light poles. I hope that you can get some good clean, and actually funny material on your site someday.

Response - poop pooo pooop pooop terd pooop weiener. wow. we are dirty ones aren't we?

Bob Saget is gay

From - "Matt"

Subject - You guy's are gay.

Message - Milkmycow is the worst website that i have ever been to. Ok, I thought that this was gonna be cool or something, but when i go to the videos they don't even pop up. That is so gay. Nothing works on your dumb website. The videos are so stupid, they would be rejects on America's funniest videos. Yeah, even Bob Saget would think that there gay. And we all know that's pretty gay

Response - Bob Saget is indeed gay. You right, there's no doubt about that. There's also no doubt about the gimpiness of your computer. Our website works just fine unlike your mothers unitary track.

staplers in teh butt

From - "Terri"

Subject - HEY!!!

Message - Hey What's up? This is Terri & Alex...We were in the car with our mother outside of Stonebriar Mall. W/ Brad. on 10/07/01. I (Terri) was the one in the front seat with the Batman Toboggan...or however you spell that freakin word....and Alex was the chick in the backseat! Your site is interesting! I especially like the MAD HUMPIN video! well we're just chillin'. My mom said hey and to staple your ass and put it on the site as a video! And Alex is a crazy donkey raper! I myself like sheep the best! lmao! SO TOTALLY KIDDING!!! Well we're gonna go rape our donkeys and sheep! You better write us back or we will never visit your site again!!!

Response - For those reading, her mom asked me and Graeme to stick staplers up our butts or something. I dunno. weird ol' lady. im suspecting drug or alcohol was involved with this particular lady. That's my excuse for the stapler incident. FYI, we chose not to accept.

Kiss My Beep

From - "BigFerg" From Waco, TX <- BigFerg? HaHa I can already tell this guy is a winner.

Subject - None

Message - Jared, I checked out your site. I watched some of the "funny" videos. I felt like most of your videos weren't so much as funny like you would see on Jackass (which you are obviously trying to ride the coattails of) but stupid. You could be funny but you try to do Jackass stuff instead of doing your own stuff. The songs sucked. Plain and simple they weren't funny or very well done. Also, I noticed some errors on your website, like images not loading and such. It also seems to be very amaturish. I'm surprised you get as many visitors as you claim. I will give you a hand for trying and I think you could be better, you have potential, but I wouldn't call you the number one entertainment site in Texas. Keep working on your stuff and I would like to see some original things.

Response - Hey, how bout we start a new site? called kissmybeep.com? I'd watch out for your cat too, it may not be around much longer! JK though, anyways, I love you too.

crack kills

From - "harknesshouse"

Subject - Eat more chikn!

Message - Moo!-ok that was stupid-Hi.We're just two chicks who were visiting Milk My Cow.No duh.Very interesting,good and bad,things we saw there.Tee hee.Especially the Scoop On Poop.Gosh and here I thought I was the only one with discolored poop.TEE HEE HEE HEE!!!!!!!!!!!!My friend likes saying 'tee hee' a lot.We also learned that only dorks write comments.So much for our social status.We must have climbed down the charts with that one.By the way,YOU GUYS ARE MEAN!!!!Just kidding.Are we though?Tee hee.Quit with the 'tee hees'!!!We go to Horn High School.Congrats on winning state.We'll get you next year (yeah,right).I don't know if I'd go that far to annoy a cow.The first way was disturbing.Tee hee.Why with the tee hees?!!!!!You know the running around part,in a certain obscene fashion (with nothing on!).Bye.Write back soon. Both of us! At harknesshouse@msn.com ("Noelle") and sparkle_horse87@hotmail ("Joan") Adios! Good Luck with the web site! P.S. Is the Love Tester accurate?Yeah,we didn't think so either.Just wanted to clear that up.

Response - Wow. Can you say "Crack Kills?" Seriously ladies, lay off the drugs. Anyways, yeah. cool. glad u like the site i think? Actually, i dont know what to think after that.

i kaint spweuel

From - "g kittykat"

Subject - heyyy

Message - this i sok if you like stuff like this i went to this site cause a friend named david told me to it was ok i am not really in all this stuff well i when i went there it was not all that bad tell those other people to mind their owm buissness well thats all gotta bounce - love bunches nikki

Response - Dude, WTF? Did you drop out of school or what? You need an edu-ma-kashion. either that or you need to lay off the drugs kid